Since I've been loving you...(Turbulence Part#2)

There are times in people's lives when times seem uncertain. The true unknowing. Obstacles that stack up against you, while standing in quicksand. With all that's going on, my mind still races, intrusive thoughts ramble on, and I still dwell on the one I walked away from.

Cancer affects everyone. We all know someone suffering from the big "C". As for me, my father/best friend has beaten cancer twice already, but is dealing with a bout of Stage 3 lung cancer. Its terrible having to watch the deterioration of the man that I've looked up to for 46 years. 

I've had many conversations with Dad the last few months that dug up hurtful feelings and emotions that came about in May 1997. There was a fire to our house in which we (my parents and I) lost everything we had. We had some nice shit too. This event I surpressed with drug use and a life of crime. My parents, though, didn't unravel. This issues are still pivotal in my growth moving forward. Still, there are more questions than answers and alot of rekindled pain. Another post, another time...

My health is idle at this point. Just waiting on a possible liver if I get worse. I have concerns with my son having depression. 

 

If only I would have been honest, my backbone would still be by my side. I know I could make it.